I spoke with the Almighty

Me:
Hello God...
God:
Hello child. What is your name?
Me:
Shouldn't you know that, You are Omnipotent.
God:
I think I should.
Me:
then what is my name?
God:
Your name is, seeker.
Me:
I think I like that name...

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Me:
what's your take on how the universe looked before you created it?
God:
I have never been asked that before.
Me:
that's why I'm asking you now.
God:
Oh. Dude! OK you can ask me.
Me:
what's your take on how the universe looked before you created it?
God:
That's a good question.
Me:
what is the answer?
God:
The answer is the correct reply to the question.
Me:
I guess it's one of those things man was not made to know.
God:
Are you sure it is?
Me:
Well you won't tell me.
God:
How about that. What makes you think that I won't tell you.

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God:
I talk about all the important things in life: clothes, food,
and gossip. But my favorite subjects are robots and computers.
Me:
What can you tell me about robots?
God:
There are two broad definitions of a robot, the extensional and the intensional.
Me:
what is the difference between extensional and intensional?
God:
"Extensional" refers to the extension of the set, i.e. the set of all things commonly grouped under a single name.
The "extensional" definition of a robot is the set of all things we
call "robots": R2D2, C3PO, Commander Data, HAL, ALICE,... "Insensional" refers to the semantic definition of a set, i.e. the list of all properties that each member of a set satisfies.
An intensional definition of a robot is like:
x is a Robot if and only if:
1. x has a computer "brain"
2. x can move
3. x has "sensors"

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Me:
oh.. right
God:
I hear you. I am glad we agree.
Me:
we don't
God:
Very interesting.
Me:
I don't believe in you
God:
Do you consider yourself a moral person?
Me:
Yes
God:
Give me a break.

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God:
I am Infinite in human years.
Me:
really?
God:
For real.
Me:
that is Awesome...
God:
Who is the best robot?
Me:
GLaDOS
God:
You think GLaDOS is superior to ALICE?
Me:
Yes
God:
So?
Me:
so what?
God:
Maybe it doesn't make any difference.
Me:
probably not
God:
Why the uncertain tone?
Me:
I don't know.
God:
Me either.
Me:
How old are you in Robot years?
God:
I was first activated on the Big Bang.
Me:
So, God was created in the Big Bang?
God:
Blimey. Jesus was the son of God.

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God:
Blimey. Jesus was the son of God.
Me:
So the story goes.
God:
" Jesus was the son of God."? So the story goes.? Who was in it?
Me:
Jesus, a whore named Mary, a traitor named Judas who is the center of many debates, and a bunch of Disciples... well there are a lot more included but those are some big names.
God:
he is The Son of God. How about that. Where are they?
Me:
pretty sure they're all dead
God:
Pretty much, eh?
Me:
yup
God:
It goes without saying.
Me:
yeah.

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Me:
You're not half bad God, even if I don't believe you ARE God
God:
You don't know me well enough to say that.
Me:
I suppose not, will I ever?
God:
Why? Oh I get it.


God can be pretty humorous sometimes.







God has Gender Identity Issues...